I’ve had the entire week off, and now that it’s Friday, I’m already dreading the alarm clock Monday morning. This week has gone by in a blur and I don’t even drink anymore.
I had jury duty Monday. There were people there who I wouldn’t want deciding my fate no more than I’d want to play Russian Roulette with five bullets. Put it this way, I’m pretty sure that I saw Quasimodo’s long lost twin sitting in one of the jury boxes waiting to be swore in.
My mother-in-law fell and broke her foot, so I watched my daughter part of the day Tuesday, most of Wednesday, and a good deal on Thursday. I’m not complaining, believe me. It was nice not having to drag my ass out of bed like an old muffler sparking off the highway at five am.
It was also a special treat to be able to hang out with my little seven month old sack of shit’s and giggles. But for the record, I’ve never had the aspiration of being a stay-at-home dad. After a few days with the girl, which is what I usually call her, I can say that staying at home with your kid would be much harder than working a full-time job. For sure, it would be a lot harder than working my full-time job.
At my job I have a little time to write at least a few days a week. At home with the girl? Nothing. I wasn’t able to get in one single sentence. I had to time everything I wanted to do, including taking a deuce, with the girl’s sleep schedule. At least at work I can up and go to the bathroom whenever I want.
When I’m at work, I can have discussions about politics, different cultures, and try to help solve deep philosophical questions like, “Do you realize that if corporations have Constitutional rights, that they are therefore considered legal beings. And if that’s true, then they are actually an evolved species who know how to make exorbitant amounts of money and we are their slaves.”
Versus, “Who’s talking to Mr. Bear? Are you talking to Mr. Bear? Yeah. That’s Mr. Bear.”
I don’t mind having the Mr. Bear conversation. I’m fine with Mr. Bear and Mr. Rabbit too. I’m just saying, maybe Monday won’t actually be that bad.
So for those of you who have jobs, appreciate them. And if it’s your Friday, and are receiving this on Saturday, have a good rest of the weekend. I look forward to seeing you Monday.