Never again Google, never again

Posted by dwallace on November 29, 2009 in google |

Just when the popular kids were starting to accept me, I let them realize how much I appreciated it and they dropped me like a big dog dropping a steaming pile of shit on a cold winter’s day.

No I’m talking about anybody in particular, it’s worse; I’m talking about an algorithm. I happened to mention that I was number #6 when you Google my name and poof! They moved me to page 5 and then somewhere past page 10. And let’s face it, if you’re past 3 you might as well be one page 1,000,000.

Well never again Google, never again will I confess my love for you out loud. What does your bitch-ass have to say about that?

I know what I’ll do. I’ll call you every name in the book, smack you around a little, treat Ike treated Tina and you’ll come running right back to me I just know it.

We’ll see Google, We’ll see.

And by the way, the reason Douglas Thomas Wallace should be listed at the top of page one on your site is because really, who’s going to Google Douglas Thomas Wallace. The only person who would do that would be Douglas Thomas Wallace himself.

Also Bob Marley Never Smoked Pot should be listed there too, because everyone knows Bob Marley did in fact smoke pot, so Bob Marley Never Smoked Pot, which is the name of this blog, should be listed on page 1 too. In case someone is actually reading this rant, Bob Marley Never Smoked Pot is the title I gave to an essay I wrote when I tried telling my stepdad that Bob Marley never smoked pot…in my defense I was about 13 and didn’t know any better.

Here’s a post with Bob Marley telling talking about his own philosphy on the herb.


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